Written by Patrick Read Johnson
Sung to the tune, 'Home on the Range'

Oh, give me a home, where the asteroids roam,
And where the bleebs and the fuzzymugs play,
Where gravity's low, and the water is snow,
And the desert winds blow you away.

Mars! Mars is my home,
Where everyone's short just like me,
I wish I was there, where there is not such much air,
And two moons to shine down upon me.